Wedding planning tips from me, a photographer.
Happy New Year and congratulations on getting engaged! It’s fairytale romantic, until the gargantuan task of planning a wedding hits you. Fear not, what you perceive as big issues are just brimming with possibilities. Things will go more smoothly if you consider the following wedding planning tips.
- It’s all about you and your dream wedding, but not in every situation.
Let’s talk about moms. It is about them, too. They also want to look gorgeous, and they often have a dream of what the day will be like. They love you more than you’ll ever know. Unless you have kids, then you know. Meeting them halfway on some things will mean so much to them.
- Choosing a bridal party is often a sensitive task, especially if you want a big group and you have a lot of friends. Personally, I think people will get over it. And in some cases, be relieved that they weren’t chosen. But don’t be surprised if someone outside of your bridal party ends up being your angel on your big day. There is always someone who comes out of the blue and saves the wedding day. It may be your sister or your maid of honor, but often it’s a random friend who sews your dress back together, who finds your earring, who decorates the last minute indoor setting plan B. Just appreciate it and know that angels do exist.
Please please don’t fret about the weather. Just be zen about it, not just on the outside, but deeply. We all know that there’s nothing you can do to control the weather. I have been to dozens of too hot, too rainy weddings, and nothing was lost. Rain is a special effect. So is fog and wind. Some of my prettiest pictures are from rainy weddings. Just make sure to prepare. One Central Park wedding I photographed came equipped with picturesque oversized white umbrellas. There was a downpour but everyone was dry and looked great.
Pick vendors you personally like. A snobby florist, a pushy photographer, and an inflexible caterer have no place in your special day. Save all your compromises for your loved ones, not vendors.
Cut costs wherever possible, but realize that you will pay in other ways. Sanity, time and money. Pick two. Even if you’re uber-organized and can DIY like no other those projects are very time-consuming. If you love it, go for it! But beware of the dream that you can do all flowers yourself. Once, as guests were arriving at a wedding the bridal party was still arranging the centerpieces. Avoid that kind of hustling whenever possible. And know that everything takes more time than you think.
Related to #5, don’t worry about every little detail. I hereby give you permission to dump those ideas you just saw on Pinterest. No, you don’t have to make cookies in a handmade bag as a parting gift for each guest. Before Pinterest, before the sea of wedding blogs, people still got married. Weddings don’t have to have a theme. I’ve gone to weddings where essentially nothing was done to the table settings. Just some nice cloth napkins and a simple centerpiece. And I’ve been to weddings that were more elaborate than the Taj Mahal. While it’s wonderful to have those special touches, it’s not essential for a festive wedding. And not worth it if you are too stressed out.
When things get stressful, repeat after me, HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA! Don’t take it too seriously. Watch a lot of comedies on Netflix. Remember what you’re doing, marrying that love of your life, that person who is on the same team as you, who will always go up to bat for you. Now knock it out of the park and happy wedding planning. Call if you have any further questions or would actually like solicited advice.
Bonus piece of advice. Dress for the season, and make sure your shoes are comfortable or at least broken in, but I’m sure all of you already know this.